Katherine, my sweet baby girl,
You are eleven months old, my little love, and this has been
another month of big changes. You put on
another pound, weighing in at 16 ¾ pounds and climbing all the way up to the
9th percentile for your actual age.
You’ve started to wave, without knowing what the gesture meant, but you
think it’s hilarious when we wave back so you do it again and again for a
laugh. Same with shaking your head
“no.” Although you haven’t yet discovered
the word “no” for yourself, you have no trouble communicating the concept. Particularly when I try to feed you something
you don’t want. You scrunch up your
little face and huff air in and out, and your meaning is quite clear. That face, which is hilarious, is also used
when you are perplexed or irritated by anything else. You are a delight, for the most part,
giggling and smiling through your days.
It takes only simple things to make you happy. Despite all the toys in your playpen, I’m
sure you would be content in there with nothing more than a wooden spoon, your
toy mirror, and your silicone toothbrush, since those are the things you play
with most. You’ve also discovered that
books have interesting stuff inside them, and pages to turn, and turn and turn
back again and you love the fabric books that your grandma made you. 
You began to pull yourself up to your knees in your bednest
early this month, and so we finally got you a full-size crib. I moved out of your nursery after a week or
two getting you settled. The overall
transition in your sleeping arrangements was so smooth that after more than ten
months of sharing space for our sleeping hours, I realized perhaps I needed you
next to me more than you needed to be there.
It was certainly more convenient for me when you cry out for your bottle
sometime between 4:00 and 7:00 am.
Despite that ongoing habit, you still sleep very well, drifting off to
sleep easily in your crib at bedtime, rarely waking except when hungry and
immediately turning over to sleep again after your bottle is emptied. You generally sleep until a civilized hour,
waking sometime after 7:30 and occasionally staying contentedly in bed until
9:00.
You crawl like an old pro now and you’ve learned to sit up
properly. Although many babies learn to
sit long before now, I never propped you up, preferring to let you figure out
how to safely move in and out of that position on your own. Sure enough, once you learned to crawl, you
easily achieved that accomplishment.
Your sense of pride when you found yourself sturdily sitting on your own
was clearly evident. You sit on your
knees when there is something nearby to grab for balance, and if you are near a
box of the right height, you get your feet under you in a position I like to
call “belly up to the bar.” It’s so fun
to see you up and about like a proper young lady after months of watching you
play in a prone position. It gives you a
new perspective while you are playing and it gives us a new perspective on you.
Now that you are mobile, you are typically off and into
everything you can reach. When you are
trying to achieve access to the object of your desire, keeping you away from
contraband items is like trying to wrestle a particularly determined eel. Daddy has dubbed you “eel girl” and, in an
homage to “The Big Bang Theory” often declares, “Eel Girl is nobody’s
sidekick!” And he’s right. You are your own little person and this
month, you’ve discovered your own will.
After months of docile compliance during changing and dressing, now you
have decided that if you don’t think it’s time for such nonsense you will have
none of it. Sometimes, this means you go
charging off half-dressed with your sleepsuit legs flapping behind you like a
gentlemen in tails. Temper tantrums are
rare, but for the first time this month we have had a handful of moments when
you’ve decided to vehemently protest the current situation. Fortunately, as you are a good-natured little
soul, these moments pass as quickly as they come.
Your new mobility has opened up the world to you. Up until now, we’ve spent most of our time playing
at home since I believe a calm, familiar environment makes for a calm and
contented baby. Now that I know you
have the power to choose where you want to be, I’ve started to take you out to
places like the children’s section of the library and setting you free to
explore. I was so proud the first time
we went there and you charged off confidently to check out your surroundings
and meet other children, because you are fascinated by small people of any
size. These are your first steps to a
lifetime of independence, and like all mothers, my wish for you is to grow up
strong and confident. It brings joy to
my heart to see that strength emerge and grow from moment to moment.
Sometimes, baby girl, when I look at you my heart explodes
because to me you are beautiful… sometimes achingly beautiful, and you take my breath away. The other night, I sat next to you in the
dark, listening to your slow, even breathing as you drifted off to sleep. I could just see your profile in the soft glow
of the full moon shining through your window.
I stayed there, long past the point when you were peacefully asleep,
savoring the moment and a bit in awe that this, this, is my life now. After waiting so long to become a mother and
wondering whether I even would, you are here, breathing softly next to me and
it is amazing. You are amazing.
I love you with all my heart,
Mummy
